someone down the street from us was getting their bathroom stripped and refitted and they stuck all the old fittings outside in the skip and basically we have two bath tubs now

1 note

lnput:

blue

breathes heavily

lnput:

blue

breathes heavily

60,094 notes

brodysbeefybiceps:

“I’d like some masking tape.”

Masking tape?

“Are you redecorating?” The words are out before I can stop them. Surely he hires laborers or has staff to help him decorate?

“No, not redecorating,” he says quickly then smirks, and I have the uncanny feeling that he’s laughing at me.

no

nO

NO NON ON O NO NO NO NO NO NO

THATS

YOU DON NOT BUY FUCKING BDSM SHIT AT A FUCKING HARDWARE STORE THIS IS THE FUCKING STUPIDEST TUCUKIGN WHO THE FUCK USES TAPE OYU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO FUCKING USE TAPE

PLEASE TELL ME I AM SORELY MISTAKEN AND THAT HE IS HERE FOR ANOTHER FUCKING PURPOSE

PLEASE.

“Some rope, I think.” His voice mirrors mine, husky.

“This way.” I duck my head down to hide my recurring blush and head for the aisle.

“What sort were you after? We have synthetic and natural filament rope… twine… cable cord… ” I halt at his expression, his eyes darkening. Holy cow.

“I’ll take five yards of the natural filament rope, please.”

i’m going to fucking cry

“Um.” I feel the color in my cheeks rising again. I must be the color of the communist manifesto. Stop talking. Stop talking NOW.

FUCK ME SIDEWAYS WITH THE SHARP END OF A FUCKING BLOODSTAINED BATTLEAXE

corys a faster reader than me and he startedfirst anyway bUT HERES SOME SPOILERS OF THE DICKFUCKERY AHEAD

2 notes

ga1axies:

soap that looks exactly like cupcakes omfg

ga1axies:

soap that looks exactly like cupcakes omfg

2 notes

theneonpurpledinosaur:

LOOK AT THIS SOAP
IT’S THE BEST
AND IT’S FOAMING

theneonpurpledinosaur:

LOOK AT THIS SOAP

IT’S THE BEST

AND IT’S FOAMING

1 note